Marshmellow Fluff

Now, I have done many not so brilliant things in my short lifetime.  That time I reached back to pet Jack in the backseat of the car and rear-ended the car in front of me.  The time I chopped all my hair off or the time that I decided having credit cards was a good idea.  But every once in a while I make a great decision and am so proud of myself that I like to gloat and tell the world about my brilliance.  One of these moments, was when I decided to pick Jesi Haack as our wedding coordinator.  Granted, I’m only having her as the day of coordinator instead of a full on coordinator (disclaimer about lack of money and making concessions here).  But I get her for one day-the most important day where I know I will be in great, creative, loving, sweet hands.  Jesi has written a lot of guest posts for LA Style Unveiled and I found her post about wedding traditions very interesting.  Here is an excerpt from it:

Here is a peek as to how a few began:

Word has it that the practice of the tossing the bridal bouquet stems from an idea that was big in the 14th century.  It was considered a big deal-io to acquire a fragment of the bride’s clothing.  Guests would grab at her wedding dress in order to tear off pieces.  And even back then, with the poofy sleeved, overly beaded dresses, the brides ‘weren’t so into’ their dress getting destroyed.  They contemplated an alternative, hence, the custom of throwing personal articles was born.  Other sources describe the garter as representing the virginal girdle.  When the groom removed the garter, he was demonstrating publicly that the bride was relinquishing her virginal status.  (So that’s how the whole ‘machismo’ thing was born, eh?)  Another popular belief was that the bridesmaids and groomsmen would sneak up to the bride and groom’s bedroom for proof that the deed was accomplished.  Then they would take an item of the bride’s clothing for good luck, which was often the garter that was used to hold up the bride’s stockings.  Awkward?  Maybe.

Why do we NOT see our man before walking down the aisle?

Why are we expected to wear a rough, stiff piece of fabric in front of our faces?  Well, back in the day when marriages were arranged by the parents, a dowry was typically exchanged.  So, it made sense that the bride’s hotness scale was REAL important.  The family wanted to make sure the dude didn’t back out!  This is where ‘giving away of the bride’ originated.  The father literally gave the bride away at the ceremony and the groom would get his first peek after lifting the veil from her face!  How romantic…{sigh} (coughhhhh) or maybe more like an internet-dating scheme…

Cutting the cake? 

During the days of the Roman Empire wedding cakes were baked with wheat and barley.  At the reception they were broken over the head of the newlyweds (huh?) as a sign of the bride’s fertility (Whaa?).  Guests would scramble for the pieces of cake (ok, I would totally do that) and take them home for good luck.

Back to my original question:  Why and HOW do traditions change?  I believe that even way back in the day, couples were gaining a ‘sense of self.’  Even in the midst of their parents choosing their mates, their society telling them how to celebrate, and their religion regulating their union, they were fighting to show their own personality.  They struggled to make their own statement.  To stand out.  To be remembered.  To illustrate their love, relationship, and personality to their guests.  So today, when we want the In N Out truck instead of the sit down dinner that our mother’s want, it is, essentially, the same as choosing to throw the garter instead of letting the guests tear apart their dress.

Where will these traditions be when 2009 is considered ‘back in the day’?

The spectrum of change is never-ending.  We are unique, quirky, and truly individualistic beings who will always be striving to make our own mark in the world.  Ask yourself, “What STATEMENT do I want to make to my guests?” … And make that statement from YOU, not from your mom, your grandma, or any website you have been stalking.  Do something different.  Be unique.  Surprise your guests.  Create something unexpected.  Do the opposite of tradition.  Create your own tradition.  Be remembered for YOU.

And when ‘The Jetson’s’ world becomes our society’s reality, be the first bride to be brought into your ceremony in an airplane car, have robots as your wedding party, and offer TONS of different food ‘pills’ at the buffet 

~ jesi haack

How cute is this idea and sooo much better than having Facebook as the only activity your awaiting guests have to do.