Marshmellow Fluff

I long for the days where my worries consisted only of which friend to play with after school. 

I am tired of being an adult.  The daily financial worries, work pressures, personal issues piling up to the side as I juggle all the other things  being hurled at me.

Sometimes I wonder if I am alone in it all.  The only one who wishes for a vacation day from being an adult.  The only person who silently wishes for an illness bad enough to knock me out for a few days, just so I can catch up on rest.

When Paul and I broke up for that one terrible week, remember that one week where the only good thing to come of it was me losing 10 pounds, which I have since found.  Anyhow, when we broke up I was clinging to any semblance of hope I could find.  I was willing and able to talk to anyone who would listen to me and give me faith that we would find our way back to one another.  During that week I went to see a friend of a friend who, “reads charts.”  She promised that not only was she legit, but she was also a wonderful person to talk to when dealing with hard times in life.

I decided to take an afternoon away from work and went to her house.  I wasn’t sure what I expected but I am pretty sure it involved crystal balls, long swirly fingernails and frizzy hair beneath some sort of ill fashioned turban. surprisingly she was normal and kind and fed me a cupcake, which I am sure created some sort of bias on my part.

During the visit she told me some things I already knew; the past few years have been very volatile, stressful and painful…CHECK!  She was off to a strong start. 

She told me the bad news was that I would experience this same sort of stress for one to two more years but after that my life would be tremendously blissful.  Translation:  Your life sucks and will continue to suck but if you just ride it out for a bit longer you will be happy you did. 

She was right.  For years my life has been bump after bump with valleys in between filled with lots of hopeless moments.  A few weeks before I went to see her I lost my grandmother, I broke up with my boyfriend and I felt like someone had kicked out my insides. 

She also told me that I would experience some sort of illness or injury that would require a lot of recovery but I would recover.  Six months later I tore my ACL in a soccer game and I am still recovering and facing 5 more months of hard work until I am fully healed.

The most important thing she told me was that Paul was “the one” and we needed to work things out.  surprisingly on my way to her house Paul called me and asked if we could talk.  After I left her house and collected my thoughts I called him, we went to dinner and within weeks were at a much better place in our relationship than we had ever been.  Now we are engaged.

This past week has been another war.

Paul’s illness, issues with my dad and stress at work. 

Once again I find myself wishing that the world would just stop for a few minutes so that I can catch my breath.  But life never stops, it doesn’t wait for you to catch your breath you just have to breath really deep and hold out until it slows…and then take another deep breath and brace yourself for the next wave.  So it seems that if my chart continues to be right I need to roll with the punches and ride it out…at least until 2011 and then it’s nothing but bliss.